I’ve heard that you can say almost anything about someone else if you follow it with bless his/her soul. For example, you can say, “He’s a backstabbing jerk, bless his soul” and people nod and smile. Try that without the bless his soul and it sounds harsh, as it should.

I was excited to learn recently that you can say almost anything about yourself if you precede it with confession. For example, “Confession: I’m awesome at WordPress hacking.” That doesn’t sound as conceited as it would have without the confession. Better yet, confession also softens admitting something less than cool. “Confession: I can play ‘Mary Had a Little Lamb’ by hitting my head.” See. It almost sounds like I’m self-aware and a little embarrassed.

Confession: I’m so much smarter and musical than that jerk Donald Trump, bless his soul. ;-)